So I am sitting on my bed folding clothes the other day and my sweet Caroline walks in and says,
"You don't want me to die do you? You want both of your kids right? And you don't want to die do you?" I just looked at her...sort of funny, I guess, because she looked back at me and said, "What?"
"Why would you say that honey? Of course I don't want you to die. And yes, I want both of my kids. And no, I don't want to die either."
She nodded her head in satisfaction and said, "Good, cuz I did not want you to die tomorrow."
I'm sorry...what? Did I hear that correctly...she said I was going to die tomorrow? Thinking that children are purer and closer to God, I was dumbfounded and for half a second I was tempted to stay holed up in the house the next day so as to not put myself out there for something to horrible happen. I did not. I figured if it was my time, in my house or out of my house I was going to go and let's face...I'd rather go down in a blaze of shopping glory. Can I get an Amen?
I did not die...obviously. Not yet anyway. I don't think often of this...that would be...well, morbid. But she got me thinking. I am not scared of the death part. I know where I am going and quite frankly, worshipping at the feet of Jesus is much more appealing than starting back to work after a glorious summer of beach bummin' it! I simply don't want to suffer when I die. Yeah, that is selfish...I know. But I don't. Now, don't read into any of this that I WANT to die right now just not painfully. I don't. I do not want to leave my kids without their mother (after all...who would feed them? or match their clothes? or WASH their clothes? or brainwash them into becoming Tarheel fans for life?) Yes, they have a dad. And he lives with us...but he is more into the yard and outside of the house and not so much on the little things like food, clothes and superior colleges!
But it got me thinking...if I did die, have I used up all my talents that He has given me? Have I given my all? Have I been all I can be for Him? It has me pondering...and wondering...
Are you using ALL of the talents He has given you...and are you using it to glorify His name?
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