Monday, June 29, 2009

Not Me!



Welcome to Not Me, Monday! This wonderful and free counseling or confession (however you see it) was initiated by MckMama. Check out her site to see what a lot of other people have NOT been doing this week!

I did NOT get all fired up at a baseball game...a 7 year old baseball game...and tell my son that if he did not get a hit at his next up to bat we were going home. I would never put that kind of pressure on my 7 year old baseball player who incidentally is only 6. (He hit the ball though...however I am NOT endorsing that kind of behavior)!


I did NOT get distracted at yet another 7 year old baseball game because of all of the phone calls pouring in to tell us that Michael Jackson had died. I did NOT feel bad for my husband whose phone had not rung with this information and have another mom call and tell him while he was standing right beside us! I did NOT almost die laughing while she called him and while he acted so serious! Our umpire did NOT get distracted either and make us earn 5 outs that inning either!!!! He would never do that to our 7 year olds (and some 6 year olds)!


I did NOT almost faint in the doctor's office after my essure procedure while I was coming off of my valium. I did NOT require 3 blood pressure checks, 2 nurses and 1 doctor to help me recover. I did NOT ignore people I knew in the waiting room who were waving at me as I sat waiting for one of those blood pressure checks because I was NOT sure if I was hallucinating or actually seeing them for real. (sorry if that was any of you!)


I did NOT drive to the beach on Saturday for an almost 3 week stay at my parents house in Pawleys Island, SC! :)

This is NOT a picture of Caroline sporting many floatation devices at Sunday night's Fourth of July celebration (celebrated on June 28th...what can we say? This state loses their governor for a while...at least the celebration was during the WEEK of the 4th!)!

What have you NOT been doing? Come on...you can tell us...we will NOT tell anyone! :)

Paige

Sunday, June 28, 2009

The Beach

So we left for the beach Saturday...at 0530...excited and ready to get there before we ever left home. I had to make a quick stop 10 minutes down the road to fix Caroline's seat and when we pulled into the parking lot of the rest area...this is what we saw.

This lady was laying on a blanket... on a bench ..... in the dark.... at a rest area. I immediately spoke without thinking (shocking, I know) about how dangerous that was...not thinking I might have to explain why that was dangerous... Never fear...my six year old sweet child said, "Yeah, someone might come steal her keys, and take her car and then how would she get home...or to the beach!" I was glad that was what he thought was "bad and dangerous"!

So I reminded my kids that they had to sleep until the sun came up (you know..after we stopped to fix the seat and saw the lady asleep....)--because that is my rule on this trip...we do NOT stay up from 0530 on...plus...I need some peace and quiet!

So Will, being the obedient one, went right to sleep. Caroline, did not. Only everytime I tried to take a picture of her being awake, she flopped to a sleeping position! NO JOKE!


She is SO not sleeping in that picture! (or the other 3 I have of her "asleep")! Needless to say, I could not "catch" her awake...and later she even talked about how nice it was to sleep in IN the car! I just smiled!

I don't usually drive all the way into Atlanta when I go to the beach either. I usually take I-285 around Atlanta because I believe it is faster (Mark and I disagree on this point)....but today I was feeling frisky, so I drove through...and saw the exit where Mark and I used to live...as newlyweds...

That exit where we lived would be Northside Dr., not 75 South...though it could be argued we lived then on 75 south because we could DEFINITELY hear it from our apartment and that we live NOW on 75 south because you can see it and hear it from our house....LOL

I snapped a picture of the Westin Hotel (still showing damage from the tornado that came through 1.5 years ago) because this was one of our first dates...to the restaurant at the top of the hotel. Mark said he wants to go back...when they get that whole "structurely sound" stuff worked out!

It takes about 8 hours to get to the beach (where my parents live) and my kids are always pretty good on that trip. Today they were super excited to get there and Caroline kept asking if she could put her bathing suit right on upon arrival and head to the beach. I said yes, of course, but ironically...there are no pictures of HER on the beach...or at the pool...she was there...I am not sure how she elluded my camera....

Needless to say we ate some lunch at grandma's and then hit the beach for a few hours and then the pool....here are the pictures to prove it....

Hello little almost one year old niece that I just met today...on the beach...all slathered up in sunscreen, my hair in a ponytail and sunglasses on....needless to say (I have said that a lot today) I think I scared her and she is not too fond of me right now! :)

Will doing his favorite thing...boogey boarding...don't let that calm water fool you....it was rough out there today...see the next picture...

Ok...not that one...that is Leslie and Gracie floating on a boogie board with no intention to ride a wave in out past the "rough" stuff....seriously, the next picture has my nephew Trey somewhere in it!

He was not a happy camper when that calmed down! So he needed a pep talk from grandpa (which, incidentally, did not work....he did not go back out to boogie board anymore).


He decided to dig in the sand with the other cousins...which I must not have been interested in photographing...

We decided soon to leave for the fresher waters of the cholorinated pool...only to find out that mom and dad's pool (the one with the food and drinks) was closed for a wedding...bummer. But never fear...Leslie's neighborhood has a pool (minus the food and drink mind you...but we said we would suffer through it)..so we went there. We even ran off some old fuddy duddy's who did not like to have to listen to children squeal and laugh and basically have a good time...

The boys decided to jump and catch...sort of....Sweet Lindsey threw the ball to the boys as dad (grandpa) said, "1-2-3-GO!" and each boy tried to catch it in midair...it was fun to watch...check out their form...Trey's is hysterical if you ask me...which you didn't.

Elijah....he got confident enough to try to catch it and turn 360s before he hit the water.

Will worked hard to just catch it and go into the water....
But Trey......


He tried to catch the ball and then sit on the water....he kept going under but we laughed so hard each time he "sat down"!

More later (with pics of Caroline)....I promise!

Paige

Saturday, June 27, 2009

An Overdue Post That Should Have Been 2...or 3!

Oh what a week!


It has been a banner week all around. Hollywood lost some pretty big names in Farrah (my dad had a poster of her that I teased him about earlier in the week stating that I could not believe my mom let him have it and he told me...SHE BOUGHT IT FOR HIM! I am still processing that), Ed (Star Search was one of my favs...) and Michael...great music, strange man.


It has been a banner week in our household as well...let's see if I can keep up with it all...


Monday and Tuesday were spent at the ballfields for Will's regular season tournament. They were 1-1 after Monday (double elimination) and came back strong on Tuesday to win both game and make it to the semi-finals.

Big Hit from Will! Altercation with coach from other team.


Will's team won that game and the game after to march them into the semi-final game on Thursday with the team we had lost to on Monday night. Needless to say, we lost again...not quite so bad as Monday, but the season was over....


However, you could not tell on their faces....(there was a picture here that disappeared...I have been wondering how to delete a picture once put on my blog and while I still don't know how I did, I am apparently capable)!

In between Tuesday's stellar performance and Thursday's halt to the season, I had my second procedure done (don't remember? go here for reference). There was absolutely no reason to think that this procedure --an essure (a tubal without surgery)--would be as bad as the first. EVERYONE said the essure was not bad at all. And you know...I am not sure that the essure itself was bad...I think I realized one important thing though...I am bad on valium...and I had to take it again. Actually, to be totally honest...ON valium I am fine...it is the coming off of the wonderful, yet short-lived high that almost kills me. Now, I am not saying the essure is a walk in the park...unless you like walks in the park in torrential downpours, with lightening striking all around, wind howling in your ears and hail large enough to make you look for cows (think: the movie Twister) (Leigh Ann, I put that in there for you...)...but when the procedure is over and your nurse looks at you and says..."Oh my...don't sit up yet...let me get you something cold to drink...what you would you like?" you know you don't look good!


So, I say, "Am I dying? Cuz if I am dying, I want a diet coke...I have sworn off of those for now... but if I am heading home anyway, then go ahead and get me a diet coke."


Nurse: "You are not dying." (you just look like you are)


"Oh, well, I guess get me a Sprite."


She leaves, and I begin to feel that "I think I am going to faint" feeling. I don't want to faint... not alone...where I could fall off the table and be on the floor with nothing on but the wafer thin paper sheet they like to call a gown...which doesn't actually cover anything....no I can't faint. I work so hard to NOT faint, that I begin sweating....sweating badly. All over.


Enter nurse...with Sprite...


She turns to look at me and says...."Is there someone in the waiting room we can get for you?"


Ok...I AM dying....and my last drink is going to be Sprite????


"So, I AM dying?"


"HAHAHAHAHA, no sweetie, you aren't dying...."


"Then no, please don't bring him back here...you will have to tend to him if you do and go get him a coke...and it would take all the attention off of me..." (I did not really say that...but if you know Mark and the story of when Will was born then you should be laughing pretty hard right now)!


I sweat more, the nurse leaves, returns with the doctor who I think has great bedside manners because she is holding my hand and talking calmly to me...in actuality, I am pretty sure was taking my pulse, not holding my hand. They take my blood pressure...won't tell me what it is...help me get dressed (that is always fun as a grown woman) and send me to the waiting room to wait 10 minutes and get my bp checked again. I get to the waiting room and it looks like people are waving at me...I can't be sure...my vision is blurry and I am stumbling to find Mark.


I sit down and ask him if people are really waving or am I seeing things...he says people are waving and by the way, he just saw my friend Kristi in here, isn't that great? Yeah, babe...super. Dying here...can't you tell?


Go back for bp check...it is UP from when I first entered the doctor's office what feels like 17 hours earlier, but they tell me...go home. So I do. I cried a lot that night...it was a rough day. But my friend Kristi made up for it when she sent me a text asking me if she had seen Mark at the OB/GYN that day! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL


As a piece of advice that not one of you asked for...I say do the surgical tubal...yeah, you might have a scar, but you are BOUND to get a whole lot more sympathy out of it than if you just have the essure "procedure"!!!!! (I know I said I would take pictures of this go 'round...but really, did you read the above...enough said).


Onto Thursday...we went to Pump It Up to jump and play Air Hockey because a) it was 197 degrees outside and b) we had to save some energy for the semi-final game that night. A good time was had by all...





Will wanted to play but Caroline said the game was louding her ears... but she wouldn't share her hitter thing! So Will basically played solo. Good news...he won! :)





The funniest thing to me was that they had these mats you were supposed to go down on when you went down the slide...Will had it together and could come down on the mat when he wanted to...Caroline...not so much...


<------- The mat you are supposed to take up there with you.



------->The mat coming down without Caroline (she is still at the top of the slide).






They both had a blast and only left because I was hungry...and driving...and they had no choice!













Friday we spent the day packing and cleaning to get ready to come to the beach....which is where we are now! And we are having a blast....I will post all about that later...after I have had some sleep!


Hope you had a fantastic week...


Paige

This post kept messing up where I put words and I quit trying to fix it...sorry!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

A Day at the Pool and Then Some

We got the best invitation Friday...a friend of mine called and said, "Got plans for this afternoon?"

Well, while I would like to say that my social calendar stays full all of the time, it does not. And so I said, "No, we have none to speak of, why?"

"We would like for you to go to the pool with us."

Score! We have only our baby pool in the driveway and so I got all excited thinking about a REAL pool and the fun the kids would have and how they would have someone to play with so I would have to do little entertaining...AND I MIGHT EVEN GET TO HAVE AN ADULT CONVERSATION!!!!


"So, what pool do yall go to?"

"Oh, the Country Club."

Uh Oh! The Country Club does not scare me...I do not worry about the fact that I am much more redneck than "country club." Am I country club material? Are my kids? I called my husband and asked him what I should be ready for and he said, "I don't know--but whatever you do, DON'T embarrass me!" Auuhhhh...thanks hon! So I gave my kids the talk. We are not just going to Ms. Julie's house, there are rules to follow and there will be other people there we need to be respectful of. They nodded their heads and seemed to understand. They even saluted in agreement.


When I told my son where the country club was, "You know that golf course we pass on the way to church...we are going there to swim." He didn't look as excited as he had five minutes earlier so I asked him what was wrong...He said, "But mom, I don't want to swim in the lake..." (there is a pond we can see from the road and he assumed that is where we were going swimming). I laughed hard and told him they have an actual pool and we don't have swim in the lake. :0 Out of the mouths of babes...

We didn't stay long because it was 112 degrees outside...just somewhere around five hours.

We had a great time and are so thankful for the invitation. By the time we got home, we realized that perhaps our sunscreen really isn't sweatproof/waterproof. And I learned a VERY important lesson....NEVER LET YOUR 6 YEAR OLD PUT SUNSCREEN ON YOUR BACK! We were slightly burned...me more than kids which was good when Mark got home. He was not happy that his kids looked like crabs...but he felt better about them when he saw me and he felt sorry for me too! :)

Saturday, after Will's baseball practice, we left for Alpharetta to visit with Mark's parents. We got there and the kids played for a while telling their grandparents lots of funny stories (funny, you know, only to a grandparent) and then they asked to go swimming.


New goggles to keep his "eyes from getting red" in the pool...he was so excited. Wore them on the way to the pool before he ever hit the water!

Caroline looks like a bad halloween costume to me...how many different colors is she sporting?
"NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!", yelled my sunburn, but off we went anyway. Mimi and Grandddaddy's pool has a waterslide...like a waterslide you get to go down at a waterpark. Needless to say, we parked it in front of that slide for an extended amount of time.



Will came up out of the water after coming down the slide with a, "That was totally awesome!"
Caroline squealed with delight each time down and before she ever got out of the pool she was begging for another ride!

We had a good two days with Mimi and Granddaddy...going back to the pool on Sunday. We even stayed to attend a patriotic music celebration at their church...only to find out that it is next Sunday! LOL

We are resting up today (and I am doing the laundry that seemed to multiply over the weekend) and getting ready for Will's baseball tournament to begin tonight. We are so excited since game time temperature should be somewhere around 90 degrees with the heat index pushing it up to about 98! SCORE!










Wednesday, June 17, 2009

(Wish it was) Wordless Wednesday

It was WICKED hot today (Tuesday)...hotter than it has been in weeks...let me check the high temps for today...

ok...so apparently they don't show you today's high temperature until tomorrow. My car temperature said 97 degrees at one time...and at another time it was screaming "TAKE ME HOME AND PUT ME IN THE SHADE!"

We had a busy, busy day...as noted in yesterday's entry. I wrote that earlier in the day...before the dentist appointment and before the baseball game (and before VBS...which we actually skipped).

The dentist was uneventful for me...they would not let me go with Caroline to get her teeth cleaned. So, who knows? It could have been very eventful, I was not there. I was reading trashy magazines in the lobby while Will played his PSP probably too loudly for the comfort of others waiting also. I did not hear any screaming or crashing coming from behind the pressed wood door they took her through, so I assume all went well. She did not let "Ms. Dede" paint the flouride on her teeth, but if that is her only crime today (which it is not), then she has had a good day!

We came home, changed Will into his uniform, fixed the 10th snack of the day, and left for the game (temp. = 94 degrees on car read-y thing). I get there and it is SOOOO hot that I try to convince Caroline to stay in the car with the air conditioning pumping hard...but she spots a pile of bright red/orange infield dirt/clay and she is gone...in her dress...and tennis shoes.

I had to be dugout mom because the coach's wife is working incredibly hard in Vegas. My shirt was soaked with sweat before the first pitch was ever thrown. I had sweat dripping in places I did not know sweat could drip. The kids begged to not finish the game...they were miserable. Well, not all of them...Caroline was in that dirt pile...digging to her heart's content.

We lost. I made the executive decision to not attend VBS because I looked like I had gone swimming in my clothes and for once during this baseball season, Caroline had infinitely more infield dirt on her than all of Will's teammates combined. The bottoms of her socks were orange when we got home...the socks that had been INSIDE her shoes!

Here are some cute pictures of the game...see how hot that sky looks?


And for those of you wondering where Caroline's dad was while she was turning orange, he was the umpire...for some reason, he is ALWAYS the umpire. He has good form cleaning off homeplate, doesn't he? He must have forgotten his uniform...


I know you are disappointed that there are no pictures of Caroline as a pumpkin/carrot/sweet potato...my hands were too sweaty to hold the camera at that point and I was a little miffed that she was orange. I looked like I gave birth to an Oompa-Loompa.

As a blessing, Will cried all the way home because "I would not take him to learn about Jesus." Yeah, I am THAT mom today. The one with the melted brain.

Paige

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

What a week!

We are knee deep in "stuff" this week. We have VBS, we have baseball games (even though the league said that they play until one week after school is out...which was three weeks ago), basketball camp, dental appointments, Father's Day coming up and somewhere along the way I need to do laundry, dishes, and clean the house! OH man...I am already going to tell you that I am not a success this week (and it is only Tuesday)! :) I am exhausted. I am drained. I am feeding my children fast food for lunch each day. Did I mention I am exhausted? Isn't this supposed to be summer---which by definition is "A period of fruition, fulfillment, happiness, or beauty." I can tell you right now, beauty is NOT how you would describe me currently in my exhausted state!

I don't have much to say/share except that I am thinking that I have allowed the excuse, "I am a horrible person on birth control which is why I can't and haven't taken it in 7 years" to allow me to snap and be really short-tempered with the ones I love. I am saying here...for all 2 of you to see, that I am not going to let that be my excuse. I may be more proned to a bad attitude...sure that horrible drug may alter my mood, but I CHOOSE my actions/words/attitudes. So I am going to choose nice...I will be the nice Paige....at least...I will try! :)

Not to be too serious, since some of you read this for its awesome humor, let me share a cute story. Will wanted us to stay today at basketball camp for the ENTIRE 3 hours. I said I would... (think: "Nice Paige") and then I attempted to entertain Caroline for those 3 hours. She eventually found a friend to run around with and I was able to take some (very dark) pictures(I had to add "fill-light when I downloaded to even see if it was Will in the frame)...(I NEED A NEW CAMERA) and watch Will play in a few games. When camp was ending and everyone was going to the "big gym" I told Caroline she had to quit running the halls with strangers (hope that is not a sign of things to come in high school) and come with me. She shrugged her shoulders and looked up at me and said, "Hey,what's in your wallet." She cracks me up...










I did play ball in high school and I am pretty sure your follow through is not supposed to go off to the side like that! But hey...it has been a long time since I played, so maybe I don't know as much as I thought I did...

:)

Paige

Monday, June 15, 2009

Not Me!



Welcome to Not Me, Monday; created by MckMama for therapy purposes. Jump over to her blog to read her Not Me's and a bunch of others too! Believe me, some are side-splitting!

I did not take my children to see the movie "UP" and did not completely need a tissue for the not-so-obvious-to-kids-sad parts. "Really?" you are asking yourself, "You did not need a tissue for a Disney 3-D movie?" Oh, and I so did not use the butter-covered napkins as my impromptu tissues only to discover the next day that I did not have an entire constellation of zits on my face!

I did NOT cook all of the meat in the house (as well as the meat I did not panic-buy at the grocery store) on Wednesday in preparation for a procedure I was not having on Thursday. I did not cook filets, ribeyes, chicken, hotdogs, hamburgers, and corn on the cob. I did not slightly burn all of it either! I do not still have some of it in the frig. I did not have to explain to my husband that we were certainly not having company that night, I just felt the need to burn things apparently in light of my procedure on Thursday. My husband did not just look at me and nod his head and say nothing (which is not miraculous after reading this).

I did not go in for a cryoablation on Thursday and I did not get to take valium for it. I did not find out that I drool on valium because I do not have any recollection of most of that day. I did not also find out that if your blood pressure drops from 148/97 to 88/66 in five minutes you are not dying (for real...you aren't)...even if you feel like it.

I did not come home from Vacation Bible School on Sunday by way of Walmart for a new faucet for my bathroom. I did not have a perfectly working faucet before I left for VBS, and I certainly am not worried that I do not have a working faucet still as of this morning. I am not worried at all that the man (Mark) who is fixing my faucet did not paint the house in a timely fashion (3 YEARS!!!) or that said man still has not finished the kitchen he started last April. Nope, I am not worried AT ALL!

What have you not been doing this week? Trust me, this is GOOD therapy and comes highly recommended...or maybe not!

Paige

Thursday, June 11, 2009

A Doctor's Appointment

This post has no pictures...be thankful, not disappointed!

OK, this could be TMI for some. I will try to give as little detail as possible to my ordeal so as to not gross anyone out, but I will have to give some details in order to explain what has happened! I had a doctor's appointment today and am currently laying in bed trying to recover. I am in pain (though no longer on pain meds) and walking hurts tremendously, however, joyfully, I have discovered that typing has no bearing on whether I feel good or bad!

This is a female issue...so be forewarned! I have had many conversations with my doctor concerning the fact that each month I basically hemorrhage and attempt to bleed to death. It has been lasting longer and longer and so my doc....being cautious...has been testing me right and left and up and down and while there seems to be nothing "wrong" with me (just don't ask my family to verify that...we are talking physically not mentally....I digress)...there also seems to be no help for this situation. So, she recommended to me that I look into something called Cryoablation (I caution, read at your own risk...I just read the definition and I am horrified!)!

I decided to go forth.

So April 9th, I went into the doctor for a biopsy. I had NO clue what that entailed and I find, strangely enough, that was the BEST way to do things...having no clue what to expect gave me very little time to get upset, worried, panicked, terrified, etc. The biopsy was done in a room where they do ultrasounds for pregnant women. Next door to me was a woman hooked up to a monitor to listen to her baby's heartbeat. The whole time I am waiting for my "procedure", I am hearing that whoosh whoosh sound that is so familiar to anyone who has ever had a doppler on their belly listening to their unborn child's heartbeat. I got sad for about half a second thinking I would never have that opportunity again...then Caroline's infancy flashed before my eyes like a really bad nightmare (killed a deer on the way to the hospital, born with no major issues, cried constantly, cried, cried, screamed, cried some more, allergic reaction to nuts--ok that did not happen in infancy, but close enough )!!!!! Then I was ready for my "procedure"....with bells on!

The biopsy hurt like I cannot explain. I remember the doctor saying, "You will feel a prick, a small pinch and slight cramping." And then she began. I felt nothing at first and thought, "this is a piece of cake." Then it hit me...all at once. One of those pains that makes you want to slam your legs together, curl up in the fetal position, grab some advil and a heating pad, a large bag of chocolates, some chips, some sort of soda and lay there alternating between a sugar coma and a salt overload. One tiny problem...I am in an ultrasound room with three virtual strangers and one of them is in a position that does not allow for the whole fetal position to happen! I begin thinking that "whoosh whoosh" sound next door might not be so bad...(cue bad memories again...and hurry!)!!!

So, with that memory still fresh in my mind, I decide what the heck and sign up for the next step. The cryoablation. One of my best friends did this last summer with NO pain meds (she lost her prescription and was too embarrassed to call the doc and tell them that so she thought, "How bad can it be?"). YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION. She almost committed suicide on the ablation table. Armed with that info, I had my meds in a safe place and followed my instructions carefully! First instruction of the day...take a pregnancy test.

I did take the test, however, I failed to mention to Mark that it was necessary for today and we almost had to call the ambulance this morning for the hyperventilation he was experiencing...it was negative. Then two hours prior to my "procedure", I had to take 800 mg of motrin (though oddly enough the prescription given was 600 mg...hmmmmm?)...and then my favorite part...I got a valium. I have never taken valium before (though I could use one right about now)...had no idea how it would affect me. Apparently, I drool, I slurr my speech, I laugh at things that are not funny, and I get really sleepy. Oh, and I apparently run off at the mouth. On top of all of the meds, I had to drink 16-32 oz of water and then NOT GO TO THE BATHROOM BEFORE THE PROCEDURE. (read this as TORTURE)!

They took my blood pressure when I got there, twice, because it was so high, and I warned them if they did it again I might not be able to hold my bladder because somehow in a way unexplainable by the medical field, the squeezing of my arm by the blood pressure cuff was actually putting pressure on my bladder. (My BP was 137/93). I told them I was really nervous because I had been talking to my friend Donna who had this done with no pain meds...they just patted me on the back and walked me to the "sub-waiting" room (I think that "sub" stands for subzero because it was FREEZING)! I was almost asleep in the waiting room and then they called me back. They asked me how I was feeling and I blurted out, to a total stranger, "Well, other than the fact that my bladder is about to rupture and I did not bring a change of clothes, I am great!" They started laughing and asked me if I wanted to let a little go. I looked at the nurse and said, "I am on valium...I couldn't stop this raging river once it gets going even if I wanted to." They all laugh again and I get on the table. They roll in a machine that looks like a small vacuum cleaner with a hose and I get nervous...they ask me if I am ready and I answered something that made them all laugh but I don't know what it was...

My doc starts with telling me that it shouldn't be too painful to which I ask if she has actually had this done before...she says no and I give her a look as if to say...don't talk to me about how it is going to feel...you know NOTHING!!! She says...I am going to give you a local so you won't feel anything (read: BIG FAT LIE)! I felt the prick, and the pain of dilating my cervix (yes, dilating...quickly...which led me to ask if they could dilate that fast why was I in labor for 37 hours waiting to dilate to 10?) More laughter. Not from me. No answer to my question either. I get dilated...whoo-hoo and the procedure begins...which I can't actually feel.

The machine however starts giving out stats...how cold it is inside my uterus, how long the freezing process has been in progress, etc, etc. To me, it sounded like that voice at the airport that says, "Please do not leave your bags unattended. Unattended bags will be conviscated" or whatever it is that the voice says. Apparently, I began to recite this phrase and my 3 new best friends just die laughing! I was not laughing because the sweet, precious ultrasound tech kept pushing right on my bladder...you know the bladder that is full with 16-32 oz of water and has been for about 2 hours...the same bladder that is ABOUT TO RUPTURE! Yet she continues to push and I continue to try not to pee all over my doctor. I was somehow misled somewhere that this procedure lasts 90 seconds...well it doesn't....they cryo-ed the right side for 4 minutes and the left for 3...I think the 90 seconds come into play with how long you actually pee once the procedure is over! Now, all of this info (the dilating, the non 90seconds, the extreme cramping...)could have been in the pamphlet they gave me in April...(but like my birthing classes which I did not finish and required me to say to the nurse when she told me to breathe during labor, "I don't know how to breathe...I did not take my birthing classes")....I did not read it! So it ends...I go to the bathroom finally...for like an hour...meet them in the subzero waiting room and they tell me they have to take my blood pressure again before they can send me home.

Two of my three best friends walk me to the lab and take my BP...which reads...147/98...oh my! You will need to wait in the waiting room and we will have to take it again in ten minutes. I go to the waiting room, sit for about five minutes....look at Mark panicked and pale and say, "I think I am going to pass out." You know that feeling....you get hot and stuffy inside your body...lightheaded...feeling kinda sick... I am fanning myself and I hear in the distance, "You are only five minutes into this and already you are having hot flashes." I think that came from Mark, but I can't prove it because of the whooshing sound in my ears. The nurse comes back out and says lets take your bp again....so I sit down...still fanning myself and the nurses eyes pop out of her head...I am thinking she is going to say 160/110....but no...she says..."You just got your pass to go home...your blood pressure is 88/66." I'm sorry, what? Did you just say 88 over 66? No wonder I thought I was going to pass out...my blood pressure was plummeting...I was dying...I just knew it....did I tell my kids I love them? When was the last time I talked to my mom, dad, sisters, brothers, friends? Have I paid all the bills this month?

Then I hear, ok...see you in 2 weeks for your next procedure! HUH? You are sending me home to die? Next procedure? Oh yeah...I get to do this same basic procedure again (complete with another valium) on the 24th...maybe I'll take pictures during that one!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Just a Lazy Summer Day!

I love summer. I love the fact that I have the best job in the world for those of us who have to work outside of the home, because I get to be IN the home with them all summer. And I love not having to get up, get dressed, drink my coffee and be AT work all before 7 am.

Monday was my first official day that I did not have to be anywhere...(Friday I had to finish up at school, Saturday Will had a 9am baseball game, and Sunday was church). I updated my Facebook account to state that "I love not having to be anywhere...or do anything..." I drank my coffee and watched some news and then glanced around me.

EEEUUWWWW!!! My house was gross. I tried to ignore it but the dirt and toys and junk were screaming my name from every inch of the house! I could not stand to stay on the couch anymore...I had to clean... And the laundry. Oh My Word at the laundry! I could not have made it out the door today with the piles of laundry grabbing at my ankles! We may not have had any clean clothes tomorrow if I had not dragged myself up off the couch to start that blasted machine going. I am not sure I would have started if I had known that I would be doing the laundry ALL DAY LONG!!! I digress...sorry.

This was a post about the lazy first day of summer. So, the more I straightened and put things away so I could finally scrub things down cleaned the madder I got. Then my husband called to say he was coming home. I told him if he wanted to have any dinner tonight he better stop for some charcoal because "I can not grill anything when I have no charcoal..." He says sure and I keep putting up all of the blasted toys...why do these kids have so many toys and who keeps buying them for them? cleaning.

However, unbeknownst to me or my charcoal-baring husband, I was getting extremely angry the longer I cleaned. When he walked through the door with my purchase for the grill and asked me how I was, I responded with something like this (and I paraphrase), "HOW AM I? HOW AM I? IT IS MY FIRST DAY OFF FOR SUMMER VACATION AND I AM CLEANING THE HOUSE AND YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW I AM DOING? I SHOULD BE OUT AND ABOUT DOING FUN THINGS WITH MY CHILDREN, THINGS I CAN'T DO WHILE I WORK DURING THE SCHOOL YEAR BUT NO, I AM TRAPPED IN THE HOUSE CLEANING! CLEANING. THIS IS NOT WHAT I PICTURED FOR MY FIRST DAY OFF FOR THE SUMMER. WHERE ARE MY FUN, RELAXING LAZY DAYS OF SUMMER?
(this continues on for a while longer and he is dumbfounded....and I begin to get lightheaded from all the yelling)...

I am sure he is wondering what happened to this person...who was all smiles and photo crazy just 18 hours earlier....this person who never takes pictures of herself but was feeling wild yesterday and wanted a picture of her and her wonderful husband....


But I don't even know where she is....


He left (more like fled) back to work and I continued to clean the rest of the day...and then posted on my facebook account " I do NOT like to clean house...and I just spent all day doing it...and now I am being OCD about anyone leaving anything laying around."

And then I remembered I had dinner to grill...so I fixed spaghetti.


Here's to a better day today... one more like this...




Happy Summer Yall!
Paige