Saturday, April 3, 2010

The phone rang....

This morning, before the sun rose, while the house was still dark and the soft snores of my son could be heard across the hall, a piercing ring sharply splintered the quietness of early morning slumber.

I sat up in bed and tried to wrap my brain around what it could be...then it hit me.

Mark's cell phone.

Mark's cell phone does this every now and then...and it is always me who is awakened by it--never him. I have the desperate need to throw the 1990s cell phone through the kitchen window as I stomp out to the kitchen to turn it off. Today, Mark actually heard it, so he ran to turn it off before it woke the kids. He was successful. I crawled back into bed and tried to fall asleep. After tossing and turning for about an hour, I finally dozed back off and was enjoying what now could be considered as stolen sleep time and then...

A piercing ring sharply splintering my sleep...what? Again? Surely not! I am not going to throw that phone out the window---I am going to put it into the disposal and turn it on for the next hour...sure to kill the horrible beast.

Wait? That isn't Mark's phone...that is our house phone. Who would be calling this early in the morning? Oh man...I hope no one died or got hurt....

I pick up my house phone and look...it is my parents' number. All my siblings and their kids are at my parents....did something happen?

I don't even want to answer. But I do. In a very early morning croaking kind of voice I say, "Hello?"

"I didn't get your message." Huh? Is this like, "I see dead people"? I said, "What message?"

My dad responds with, "Oh no, it wasn't her."

HUH? I have no idea what is going on...."Dad...what are you talking about?"

PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO WHAT IS NEXT!

I hear this: "We are sitting here around the kitchen table watching FOX News and we hear Dave Briggs talking about lies people tell and he says that Great Britain's favorite lie is 'I didn't have cell service' and he asked people what their favorite white lie is and he reads some and then he says, 'This is my favorite one. I got it from Bucknerfamily on Twitter who says, "I never got your message." We all thought it was you who sent it but I guess not since you aren't up and couldn't have sent it to the show this morning."

I groggily state that I did not send it this morning, but I did send it yesterday when I read his question on Twitter. Well, my dad shouts, "It WAS her!!! It was! She sent it yesterday!" And then the sound of laughter almost exploded my phone...it was clear that my family had been up and drinking coffee since at LEAST 4 am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love that they read my message on FOX News, but hello....now my cover is blown! I have to come up with a new favorite excuse now....

Maybe...."my cell phone battery is on the brink...it keeps dying!" ???? What do you think?

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