So, I told you yesterday that all about our state testing and I am so glad we are finished for the week.
However, I had a student who somehow missed an answer (or five) and so her question in the test booklet did not match up with the bubble number on her answer sheet. She was getting ready to answer the last question only she was bubbling in #31 instead of #35. She raised her hand and when I saw what had happened, I told her to go back from #1 and try to see where she may have missed one (or, you know, five). She kinda looked at me like I had 3 heads and then shrugged, filled in her remaining 5 answers with random guesses, closed her test booklet and sat for 30 minutes while the rest of the class finished.
I wanted to scream. I wanted to tell her to open her book back up and find her mistake. I wanted to MAKE her fix the problem. But I couldn't say anything. My hands were tied (not literally, of course). I had to just walk away, knowing that she had messed up her entire section; knowing that she was not working up to her full potential; knowing she was not going to get a score that reflects all she knows. And knowing that there was nothing I could do but sit back and watch.
The day ended and when I got home I had a package in my mailbox from my sweet sister "anonymous" (that is her name on the comments of my blog). It held a devotion book called Jesus Calling. I glanced through it and thought, "That was sweet of her" but didn't have time to read much because we had to run out for a ballgame.
When I returned home, I picked the book back up and turned to today's reading. I read a sentence that changed my whole perspective on what happened today. "My world is your classroom." I briefly thought, "Well, Lord, you would not have been happy if you had been in MY classroom today."
But I was in your classroom today, Paige. I am there everyday. And there are lots of days when I stand there waiting for you to choose the right thing--to fix YOUR answers--and you turn your back on what you know is right and choose another way. In essence, you fill yourself up with whatever is easiest, shut the book and sit back and wait. I want to somehow make you understand that there is more for you, so much more for you, but you won't listen. You aren't working to your full potential. But I can't do anything about it until you choose to listen to my voice and follow my direction--even if it is hard--because I know what you could be doing right now...
What a wake-up call. What a slap in the face. Not a mean, I hate you, slap in the face. But one of those meant to wake you up when you have passed out from fear but you need to get up and run because that thing is still chasing you kind of slap. The kind that saves your life. All of my grumbling and complaining about my student giving up and yet that is what I do when I choose to live in my own strength and follow my own path instead of listening to the voice of my Instructor. Thankfully, my Teacher has not given up on me and He waits patiently for me to fill in the correct bubble.
I think I need to go check over my bubble sheet for the day--and make sure my answers all line up with what THE Book tells me.
So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin. Romans 7:21-25