Tuesday, August 23, 2011

The Heart of the Matter

I have mentioned before that our church has been/is going through some growing pains due to changes. Change is hard. I know. It touches everyone a little differently. Some people lash out. Some people stay scary quiet. Some people leave. Some people pretend that everything is ok...

Everyone has there own way to process change. I remember bringing home my first baby. Oh my what a change that was. I made Mark switch sides of the bed with me so I could be the one near the pack-n-play. My sleep patterns changed...not sure I have ever gotten those back. My priorities changed. My outlook on life changed drastically. But it was all for the best. I had a beautiful baby boy to call my own...it was hard, but it was worth it. Most things that are worth it bring hard changes.

Personally, I think change is so hard because I think we feel like we are standing on shaky ground. We are not totally sure we can trust our new circumstances.

What we don't realize is that that is OK.

We should never trust our circumstances.

We should trust the One who put us in that circumstance.

In order to do that we have to have hearts that seek Him with total reckless abandon. Too much thinking, pondering or weighing of options will only slow us down in our pursuit to follow Christ. Our WHOLE hearts have to be sold out to Him. I find that hard.

I can readily give up much of my heart to God but my WHOLE heart...that is tougher. He wants it though...in order to work in my life He NEEDS it. When we choose to follow Him we have to choose that it is all about Him. My wants, my needs don't matter. It is giving Him our whole heart even if it is piece by piece.

Psalm 51:10 says, "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

We may have to give Him our hearts each and every day until He has the whole thing. And that is OK...

This picture of hearts on the steps (or "altar") of our church remind me of what I need to be doing. It is laying it down before Him each day, asking Him to pick it up and clean it, make it pure and then let that pour out into the rest of my life.

It is trusting the only One who is trustworthy enough to hold my heart and fix my heart. It is humbly bowing before Him and letting Him lead me wherever He wants me to go. Sometimes we feel like our hearts have been trampled and that we need to protect it. But giving it to God is putting it in the safest place it can be.

My Heart

My heart is filled with so many things that are not a reflection of you.
Things of this world that seem so important, have a tendency to cloud my view.

I fill it up with empty words, broken promises and so much more.
I stuff as much of this world as I can into it and wonder why I feel so unsure.

I begin to doubt the truths I know are true and believe the lies I’m told.
I stumble, I crumble, I lose my step, under pressure I tend to fold.

I begin to build walls around my tender heart, to protect it from the wind and rain.
As I block out the voices, the looks and the hurts, I hope I can’t feel the pain.

I tune out every voice that is calling my name, too afraid to see who it might be.
Too afraid to turn around and notice that my Savior is calling to me.

He is asking me to give Him my heart, to hand it over to his loving hands.
He is asking me to trust Him at His word, because He completely understands.

He wants to tear down my walls and open my heart in order to draw me closer to Him.
He wants me to fill it up with the things of Christ, so the pull of the world grows dim.

He is asking me to listen, to trust, to believe in the peace He leaves.
He is asking me to give Him my entire heart, piece by loving piece.

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1 comment:

  1. Paige, I am a friend of Leigh Ann's. She sent me the link to your posting so I could enjoy your gift and be touched by the words God gave you. I did and I was!!! The anointing is truly on your your pen. This really speaks volumes to my heart and challenges me. Thank you for your faithfulness to Him.